Australia — A woman given an ultimatum between her pet crocodile and husband chose the one that was literally cold-blooded.

Vicki Lowing, 52, had the choice to find a new home for the 13-year-old crocodile Johnie or see her husband, Greg, leave. Lowing picked Johnie, citing that Greg is far better suited to take care of himself than the crocodile she raised from the time he was a baby, when she found him abandoned on her doorstep.

Since her 2005 divorce, she has discovered that Johnie is, in fact, female.

Texas — Police discovered a woman living with her boyfriendís corpse.

The woman, whose name has not been released, was discovered with the decomposing body of William Drake, an alleged shut-in. Police reported that Drake had died a week before a neighbor noticed the smell coming from the apartment, and that his death was from natural causes.

The woman, who has a history of mental illness, has been committed for mental evaluation.

Conn. — Karaoke patrons were given more of a show than they bargained for when six women assaulted another while she performed.

The 25-year-old victim was knocked to the floor, punched, kicked and suffered hair-pulling, leaving her with bruises and a chipped tooth. All of the attackers were minors, and all have been charged with assault.

The song being performed was “A Dios Le Pido,” by Colombian pop star Juanes.

S.D. — After a failed attempt to steal rum and cola from a shop, a 300-pound, cross-dressing man fled, and is being sought for attempted burglary.

Police in Sioux Falls are searching for the suspect. After the suspect left the store with the liquor and soft drinks, an employee confronted him and managed to secure the rum. The suspect then threw the Coke at the floor and attempted to bite the employee.

Essex — Signs warning of the danger of poisonous snakes have been found in an area popular for carnal hookups.

Locals are unable to confirm the accuracy of the sign, which says: “Warning!! Poisonous Snakes. Adderís [sic] are about!” However, that species is not even indigenous to the area. The accompanying cartoon features a person encountering a snake.

The city council is undergoing an investigation to discover who posted the signs in the area popular on adult sites and littered with used condoms.

Information for this column was taken from http://metro.co.uk.

Reach columnist Matt Jackson at news@dailyuw.com.