I like women.

Though that’s a good prerequisite for sleeping with them, it’s often not enough to ensure they will enjoy it.

Many have shared their advice with me about technique. Sadly, I have heard some very bad advice about what constitutes good technique, such as, “Tongue the alphabet into her;” “Foreplay is for sissies;” and “All every woman wants is a penis.”

Hopefully this too short and simple blurb will help some of you. Whoever says he or she can tell you how to please a woman in 600 words is obviously lying — or being lied to by a great number of women.

First of all, there is such thing as a clitoris: It does exist. Generally, women like you to play with this thing called a clit. When I say “play,” I don’t mean that you should shove your fingers hard on it at first and then move onto the “real stuff.”

Girls, if you want to figure out what you like or what another might like, masturbate.

Guys, get a good idea of what’s going on down there before you attempt it. Then listen to your partner; ask her what she wants. Sometimes this involves going down on her. If you don’t know her well, I would advise using a “dental dam,” a rectangular sheet of latex that can be placed over the lips; Cold sores are never attractive.

It’s good to start with your fingers, so you can have an idea of what she is like. All women are different. Then, while going down on her, lick around and tease; some women even like it when you focus on areas other than the clit. You can lick up over her clitoral hood or around her vagina. For those of you obsessed with penetration, sex is not about how fast you get the job done, but how much pleasure or emotional value you both get from it.

As for penetration, some women love it and some hate it. This is an instance where it is highly beneficial to talk with your partner. Some women have painful sexual histories, and you don’t want to make that worse, regardless if you are using your fingers, a dildo or your penis. Penetration is invasive and can cause emotional vulnerability for some. For those of you who have never been penetrated, try to think about that the next time you have sex. Keep in mind how much you don’t know about what the other person is feeling.

Remember: if you’re a guy, use a condom.

Girls and guys, either keep your fingers as clean as possible — no dirt under the nails and have your nails pared down — or wear a latex glove. The chemical equilibrium in the vagina is very sensitive, and you don’t want to scratch such a delicate area with ragged or long fingernails.

Most of you have probably heard of the mythical G-spot. Whether it exists or not, trying to find an area that your partner enjoys is one of the most exciting aspects of penetration.

Try out some sex shops. Babeland is usually tasteful and not cheesy. I like the workers at the Crypt Off Broadway on Capitol Hill; I can ask them anything. Amour on the Boulevard in Tukwila has a bigger selection, but the workers are not as helpful.

Again, there are a variety of techniques, positions and toys that one can use. All I can say is this: Be open to the idea of trying new things.