By Christian Caple

The Daily

Hide the women and children. The Apple Cup is tomorrow.

And this year, it could get downright scary.

Winless Washington and one-win Washington State will clash for the 101st time tomorrow in Pullman, in what some are describing as the worst match-up in the history of major college football.

WSU’s only win is against a Football Championship Subdivision team, Portland State. The Huskies haven’t won since last November, when they beat California.

UW and WSU are 117th and 118th in the nation — out of 119 teams — in total offense, and in scoring offense, respectively.

The Cougars are 118th in the country in scoring defense, allowing 48.5 points per game. They’ve given up 60 points or more in four games, and have been shutout three times. They gave up 58 points to Stanford. At one point this year, they were outscored 172-0 over a 10-quarter stretch.

Washington has posted some embarrassing numbers of its own. The Huskies are on pace to have the worst defense, statistically, in school history — a distinction currently held by last year’s team.

They’ve had one 100-yard rusher this season, and haven’t rushed for 100 yards as a team since losing to Oregon State five weeks ago.

Mature audiences only, please.

Tomorrow’s battle for the Pac-10 cellar — the first ever meeting between 10-loss teams in conference history — will be a pillow fight in every sense of the word.

But it’s a pillow fight that Washington is favored to win. Most Vegas casinos list the Huskies as a 7.5-point favorite.

Yes, a winless, 0-10 team is favored to win on the road by a touchdown.

“I’d say it must be a rivalry game,” UW coach Tyrone Willingham said when asked what his reaction would be as an outsider to a winless team being favored on the road.

The fact that UW can finally approach a game knowing it has a chance to win — expected to win by many, even — may provide a shot of confidence to a team in desperate need of some.

And after all, it’s still the Apple Cup. Except this year, the motivation may come more from wanting to avoid the embarrassment of a winless season than from playing a rivalry game.

“This is one of the more naturally exciting weeks of the year,” Willingham said. “The Apple Cup brings a very special energy to it and obviously almost every household has some feelings; the game has some impact on them and what will take place on Saturday over in Pullman.”

Sophomore tailback Brandon Johnson doesn’t think the two teams’ woeful performance this season will temper the game’s intensity.

“Smack talk is always going on,” Johnson said. “Every week in a game you’ll see different people mouthing off. It’s just a part of the game. Getting a win is the most important part. I think the trash-talking is going to bring some fun to the game.”

Trash talk would be only fitting for a game between two teams that have looked like garbage all season.

Reach reporter Christian Caple at sports@dailyuw.com.