My dad drove me crazy when I was little.

Whenever we went anywhere, and I mean anywhere, he would strike up a conversation with someone. Grocery shopping took twice as long with him because he would usually end up chatting with someone; usually the person working the register. In a matter of minutes, the cashier and my dad would be swapping childhood memories.

At the age of 15, I didn’t appreciate this. In fact I thought it was downright embarrassing. You don’t talk to the cashier at Safeway, you make a few attempts at small talk: “Hi. How are you? Good. How are you? Fine.” Then you move on. You don’t ask them anything personal.

Many of us live by these self-imposed rules. We are content talking to our friends. When we go to a public place, like a coffee shop, we turn on our computers, ignore those around us and stick in our headphones.

I’m not condemning any of you because I’m guilty of this too. When I had to take the bus downtown for an internship, my iPod was my best friend. I rarely talked or even made eye contact with my fellow commuters.

Halfway through the quarter though, I decided to leave the comfort of my music and try talking to those who sat next to me. It took me forever to think of anything to say, and once I mustered up enough courage to speak, the passenger sitting next to me was already listening to his or her own iPod.

I don’t think this is my unique problem. We as a society, maybe especially as independent Seattleites, have lost the ability to communicate with each other. We walk to class, head down and headphones in, avoiding eye contact with one another. Because we have cell phones to text our friends, laptops to e-mail our family and MP3 players to fill the rest of our time, we have no need to converse with those we are next to at a bus stop, or the people who stand behind us in the grocery line.

Am I the only one who thinks this is sad?

Are the rest of you like me, secretly wondering why it can be so awkward to strike up a conversation with a random stranger?

Occasionally I recall friends telling stories about having a good conversation with some stranger they happen to meet. Unfortunately, it seems like the occurrence of these stories is becoming less and less common.

I don’t consider myself a particularly shy person either. I don’t mind public speaking, and I’ll easily tell you what’s on my mind. But like many, when it comes to talking to someone I have never met, and really have no reason to meet, I am oddly tongue-tied.

I believe this needs to change. People are just people and strangers are often just like me, wanting to get home faster during an evening commute or becoming distracted from studying in a coffee shop.

I’ve been told that Americans are friendly, but what I’ve also been told is that friendliness is often fake. The “hi, how are you?” is not genuine, and if you dare to say anything beyond “good,” most people don’t want to hear why.

So I’m calling for a change. Let’s unplug our iPods for once, turn off our phones and look up from our computers. Maybe we’ll meet someone new, learn something new and become like my dad, able to talk to anyone in a grocery store.

Reach columnist Erika Cederlind at opinion@dailyuw.com.