In a noisy lounge at the UW Business School, Megan Mayes is eating lunch. She finishes her clam chowder soup quickly, often glancing down at the day planner on the table in front of her. Every day is filled with things to do.

Mayes, 28, is a graduate student in the full-time Master of Business Administration program, one of the best in the nation. Like every other MBA student, she has to balance an average of 50 hours a week of academic work with internships and job hunting.

Unlike nearly everyone in her class of 90, however, she also has a 2-year-old boy.

While about 10 men and two other women have small children, she is in the minority in the high-tempo, high-intensity world of the MBA program. Mayes balances the demanding life of a full-time MBA student with her full-time job of being a mom and wife.

She earned her bachelor’s degree in political science from St. Mary’s College in Moraga, Calif., and then worked at the U.S. Department of Justice’s office in Portland, Ore. As a legal assistant, she worked on some of the most challenging family cases in the system.

Mayes went on to work for the non-profit World Wildlife Fund in Washington, D.C., but wanted to further her education.

One of her early inspirations was her own mother, who went back to school to get her undergraduate nursing degree when Mayes was in high school. Her mom went from working as a janitor to becoming a registered nurse, all while taking care of her family and Mayes’ elderly grandmother.

“I was in awe of what my mother did, and what she became, because she was willing to go out and do something that was really difficult,” she said.

Mayes applied for the UW’s MBA program and was accepted in April 2006.

She had a small problem. Her son. Benjamin, was less than a year old at the time. She applied for child care as soon as possible.

“It was insane, thinking, ‘I have a full-time program, they’re waiting for me to be there, and I have no care for my child,’ and feeling that burden,” she said.

In July, two weeks before the MBA program started, she entered Benjamin into the UW child care center at Radford Court. Mayes suddenly faced multiple challenges, including finding transportation for her son to and from child care and dealing with the intense, group-based nature of a full-time MBA program.

“Even though it was completely out of my way, I was just like ‘OK, full-time day care. I’m in,’” she said.

In the meantime, Mayes, her husband Jared, and Benjamin moved to the Greenwood neighborhood in Seattle. Jared, a law librarian, didn’t drive to work, so Mayes had to take the lead on getting her son back and forth from his day care center. The 30-minute drive each day was rough on both her and her family, and Mayes had to leave school at 5:30 p.m. every day to get back in time to pick up her son.

“I literally felt like every day last year I was surviving ... each school day, getting done everything that I had to get done before I could go to bed at night,” she said.

That meant skipping assigned readings and only turning in the absolutely required written work each day, in what she calls her “survival mode.”

Mayes and her husband decided to move to Radford Court, which provides family housing for university students. They made the transition in August 2007. Being closer to school has made things a little easier, and she feels better about the care her son is receiving and the fact that he’s closer to home.

Still, the move was a reality check.

“It was really acknowledging limitations, saying, ‘I’m sorry, I can’t do this anymore, and so we’re going to have to spend more money to live, a lot of money on day care, but that’s just what we need right now,’” she said. “There’s no other way to do it.”

In order to cope, Mayes sets firm boundaries and keeps a detailed planner. She refers to her planner as her brain, but confesses that she never thought she’d become one of those “schedule people.” Now, it’s essential.

She tries to write things down as far ahead as possible but can only actually plan a day or two in advance. She honestly can’t say what her plans are a week from now.

“I can’t focus that far ahead,” Mayes said. “It really is one day at a time.”

As Mayes enters the second year of her program, she continues to balance her dual roles as a full-time student and the mother of a toddler, but said it can be hard wearing two hats.

“I tend to judge myself against people who are doing both roles perfectly,” she said. “I’ll judge myself as a mother against somebody who has a part-time job or is a stay-at-home mother and bakes cookies three times a week.”

“Then I’ll judge myself professionally in the MBA program against the real go-getters who are on my team, who pour their life into school projects — which I can’t do,” she added.

These projects involve working in teams, often with people who don’t have kids of their own and who can have trouble understanding what Mayes has to juggle.

“Most of our full-time students do not have full-time jobs or children, and there is an unwritten group expectation that someone is available all the time, or at least a good part of it,” said one of Mayes’ teachers, Elizabeth Stearns, a senior lecturer in marketing and international business.

“This can therefore become very difficult for the full-time student like Megan, who also has a child,” Stearns said. “These students sometimes have to make trade-offs, and sometimes these are understood by the group relationship and sometimes not.”

But her balancing act has drawn admiration from her instructors, who consider her a hard-working, proficient student and a valuable member of their courses.

“She takes her classes seriously, is prepared and participates,” said another of her instructors, Terry Mitchell, a professor of management, organization and psychology.

“That means she is, from my perspective, coping very well with the multiple demands on her time,” he said. “She shares personal experiences when we talk about issues like work-life balance, using flextime and work perks such as on-site day care.”

Despite the challenges, Mayes said it’s well worth it.

“I really, really believe, though, that I have to do this. I have to do something,” she said. “I can’t be only a mother because I would go crazy.”

While she respects stay-at-home moms, she believes it’s ultimately in her son’s best interests for her to earn an MBA and use that to get into a family-friendly career path.

“You have to live your life. Just because you’ve had a child doesn’t mean that [you] have to start living [his or her] life exclusively,” Mayes said.

“I wouldn’t give up any of it,” she said. “In the end, I really believe that I’m a good mother and I’m a good business student, and the fact that I can be both of those things has given me a lot of confidence to go out and look for another job and know that I can be valuable to them as well.”

Mayes has two more quarters to go. The end doesn’t seem to be in sight quite yet, so she’s still taking it one day at a time.

She said “It seems like I’ll be going to school forever.”

[Reach reporter Will Mari at features@thedaily.washington.edu.]