This week’s Wild and Woolly presents the definitive guide to DJing a party in Seattle with recommendations of songs and decorum.

The most important thing about DJing a party is playing good music. It doesn’t matter if the DJ has three thousand dollars worth of equipment on his table. If he can’t play the songs people want to hear, the party will be lacking.

When providing advice about a playlist, I need to recommend a few local hits along with the international classics. The Kingsmen (Louie Louie), Nirvana, Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head and United State of Electronica are critical.

Seattle party music is best when it mixes fuzzy post-lumberjack garage rock and funky downtown disco-pop.

People love to hear local favorites. For example, playing the Blue Scholars at a party in the U-District rarely backfires.

In 2008, the number one rule of DJing a house party is play bangers. What are bangers you ask? Bangers are songs that crank up real loud and have a huge, distorted baseline under a catchy hook. Ed Banger Records of Paris currently houses the royal family of disco, house and dance music. The manger of Ed Banger, Pedro Winter (also known as Busy P) manages Daft Punk and Justice.

When people really need to dance, DJs need to play what’s expected. Next to Justice, Daft Punk and the latest remixes, Michael Jackson singles never disappoint.

While ideally a DJ would like to feature a really huge classic or up-and-coming single near the end of the set, often a very popular song can jump-start an evening of disco. I don’t recommend beginning a Friday night with Justice’s “Never Be Alone” remix, but if a DJ were to do such a thing, they would need to maintain a really high level of energy, or risk peaking early and leaving everyone feeling cheated.

When playing a long set, be sure to break up the evening’s dancing with a few down tempo songs. I like to play sixties pop songs by the Beatles, the Beach Boys, the Zombies and the like. There are also certain dance-oriented bands that work well for transitions between dancing and standing around. Hot Chip exudes a groove that gives people the chance to dance, if they are ready, but doesn’t force everyone into hysterics just to keep up with the music.

In terms of DJ equipment, more expensive and sturdier is better. Playing music on turntables is cooler than playing music DJ CD players, though more difficult. Playing music off an iPod or computer cuts the DJ’s tools in half and makes mixing awkward or impossible. Mixing is the art of transitioning between songs. It requires two music sources, a mixer, and lots of practice.

When organizing a house party, concert venue or church service, bigger speakers are better. I recently picked up old home stereo speakers with dual 12-inch cones. The pair was made in the early ‘90s but they cost me ten dollars and they sound like a dream at full volume.

Finally, if an aspiring DJ ever decides to use an iPod, laptop or other fragile dance tool, I recommend that they figure a way to keep the mixed drinks a safe distance away. I’ve been lucky in the past, but the chances of losing my laptop to a spilled margarita on any given night are probably one in four.

It’s a dangerous, no-paying gig if you can get it. But young people need to party, and parties need music. Do the DJ math.