Last Saturday, The Seattle Times' Northwest Life section featured a swell article about a quaint past-time: hydroplane racing ("Race a thunderboat behind your bike!", Stuart Eskenazi, July 28). Written in the innocently childish vernacular of a 1950s-era boy, this first-person instruction manual described how to create an ideal aerodynamic wooden boat that won't flip as it's dragged behind one's bicycle. Eskenazi gives such choice advice as, "Make sure the string is strong and secured really good," and, "Use an enamel to paint the boat in the colors of your favorite unlimited hydroplane ... or personalize it and call it, like, the Miss Ricky Roostertail, although that sounds kind of dumb because, well, I'm a boy."

Although the hydroplanes featured at this weekend's Seafair festivities are propelled by powerful turbine engines rather than two small legs and a bicycle chain, it's hard not to feel as though there's something both quaint and dumb about paying to lounge around in a huge crowd for three days to catch brief glimpses of boats and airplanes zooming by. This year, however, Seafair organizers have provided those with extreme social anxiety an added incentive to subject themselves to a relentless barrage of human contact and loud noises: good old-fashioned rock 'n' roll.

The lineup, while a bit top-heavy and featuring many over-the-hill local musicians, is undeniably enticing. In addition to Saturday night's headliner, the reinvigorated grunge pioneers Mudhoney — whose 2006 album Under a Billion Suns earned the band some of its best critical praise — there will also be a rare performance by the Young Fresh Fellows (noon, Saturday). Although far from young, the Fellows' energetic power-pop should still sound as fresh as a tossed fish hitting the floor at Pike Place Market ... only better.

Another act that won't stink is The Feelings Hijackers (2:30 p.m., Saturday), a side project of The Presidents of the United States's Chris Ballew. Along with Mike "Outtasite" Singleton, Ballew has created what he calls "acoustadelic swing along crunch-beat jingles sung by lofty cloud high skeletons." And that doesn't even begin to touch on the "sideways" rapping and "jumping about to some ill beatz." Lofty though his ambitions may be, The Presidents' recent back-to-back-to-back stint at The Showbox over Presidents Day weekend proved that Ballew still has the energy and stamina to back up as many outlandishly run-on claims as he wants.

The weekend's festivities also include performances by Patient Patient (4 p.m., Friday), The Blakes (6:45 p.m., Saturday), The Purrs (2:30 p.m., Sunday) and many others, as well as a fringe comedy stage with a few performances spread out over the weekend. Oh, yes, and there will be fireworks. And hydroplanes — lots and lots of hydroplanes.

Visit seafair.com for the complete schedule and more details (SEAFAIRocks, Genesee Park, Friday, Aug. 3 through Sunday, Aug. 5, $25/day adv, $30/day dos, general admission Friday is free, earplugs not included).