The ideal commencement speaker … sort of

If you could have an hour of wisdom (Ok, maybe 40 minutes, it’s said that the chairs graduates are made to sit on at commencement ceremonies are rather stiff) from one of the nation’s more or less successful people, whom would you choose?

It’s a choice many students have little or no say in. In perhaps a final act of “this is what’s good for you” colleges and universities invite people of noted accomplishments for a chunk of verbal meditation on education, life and success.

The UW has not announced who its commencement speaker will be this year, but previous guests have included Seattle playwright August Wilson and filmmaker Sherman Alexie.

Among the expected politicos and people of industry are a few interesting choices. Courtesy of The Chronicle of Higher Education, here’s a sampling of colleges who have announced this year’s commencement speakers:

Duke University will entertain General Motors Chairman G. Richard Wagoner Jr., who will undoubtedly tell students that if they go into the car industry, working for an American firm is not the way to go.

Ozarks Technical Community College in Springfield, Miss. will hear from state treasurer Sarah Steelman, (“a republican,” The Chronicle feels it’s important for its readership to know), while New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg (also a republican) will foray into the Midwest to address students at the University of Oklahoma at Norman.

Williams College in Massachusetts will hear wisdom from news anchor Katie Couric, while the women of Smith College will be treated to the styling of Gloria Steinem.

Sex advice from a Savage – in the flesh

Speaking of speakers, nationally syndicated sex columnist and Stranger editor Dan Savage voyaged to the University of Oregon earlier this week to give a talk about everybody’s favorite subject.

Savage’s straight-up life advice was probably more telling and more memorable than anything Couric or Bloomberg could say to a group of newly graduated students who are just looking forward to getting sloshed with their parents at graduation parties after the ceremony.

Among other things, Savage touched on religion (“I hate religion,” The Daily Emerald quoted him as saying) and how to deal with your parents in difficult circumstances (“Lie to your family.”).

And of course, there was advice about sex.

“Enjoy your sexuality now while you’re young and hot. Act on your fetishes, now because if you wait till you’re 50, you’ll have to pay people.”

Like words from an oracle. Attention commencement speakers: do it like Dan.

Graffiti this

Two kids from Centralia have been arrested for covering a Pullman neighborhood with racial graffiti, including a swastika and the words “white power,” The Daily Evergreen reported Tuesday. Charges of malicious mischief are in the works for the young men, aged 18 and 21.

A police officer who spoke to The Evergreen said incidents of this nature often happen in tolerant Pullman, where obviously the only thing people object to is Husky paraphernalia.

There has been a rash of vandalism in Pullman and on the Washington State University campus within the past few weeks, The Evergreen reported, leading police to think the graffiti is the work of more than just the two men who have been arrested.

The officer also said he was glad to see the suspects behind bars.

“I think that [the racist graffiti] universally disgusts all of us,” Sgt. Sam Soren said. “It makes putting them in jail all the more satisfying.”

As if locking people up isn’t satisfying enough.

Reach columnist Blythe Lawrence at news@thedaily.washington.edu.